zetsubous | mailbox

[ WHAT IF SHE'S ALWAYS IN THE HOUSE?? Ok, let's roll with this! She hears the ringing, looks at the Caller I.d. SON WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!

--Hesitating, hesitating until the last ring! And she's met with a chorus of mother! Wow, he's a good son. ]

How do you know how to use a phone? [ Yep, that's what he's met with. ]

[BEING OBNOXIOUS.]

Would you believe me if I said that God told me?

[ HE IS THE MOST OBNOXIOUS CHILD!!! ]

No, God doesn't exist. What do you want?

[ Can't he see how busy she is!!! ]

[With that, driving people to despair???]

... How do you feel about gifts?

[ Right on the ball. ]

I love gifts, and who doesn't? Lame people, that's who! Why are you asking? Are you getting me a gift, son?

[Okay, good to know she won't try to kill him just for that. Probably.]

That depends. Do you like flowers?

[ She doesn't kill little kids, so he's all good. ]

Uh, huh! Of course I do. Like who doesn't? Flowers are super-duper pretty, y'know! Are you gonna get me some flowers?

Oh, tee-hee! You, like, don't have to worry! I'll act super surprised when I get 'em!

[ And here she is jumping to conclusions. ]

[That's slightly reassuring to know.]

Well, it's more like one flower, to be honest.

O-one flower? Just one measly little flower? [ Now look, she's fake crying!! ] Is that all I'm worth to you?

[Her fake crying fails to move Luke.]

Sorry, sorry, I gave the others away.

[ It totally should. ]

And you came to me last because.. ? Shouldn't your mother be top priority? [ As long as his "father" didn't get a rose, Junko might stop complaining. Maybe. ]

... I was saving the best for last...?

[okay no not really]

you don't have to lie. i can tell with the tone of your voice that you are lying.

All right, then. It didn't occur to me to give it to you until just a little while ago!

So you did think of me last! That's super-Despairing, you know! Thinking of someone who feeds you, cleans for you, washes your clothes--! [ He really is the rudest son. ] You can't give it to me, I'm not home!

Then I'll wait for you! Aren't you glad I thought of you at all?

You will have to wait, won't you? [ Which means she's going to take extra long to arrive back home! ] No, you should have thought of me first. I despise being placed last.

Then just think of it as saving the best for last! If it helps, I'm giving you the most unusually coloured one.

Of course your mother is the best, she will expect no less from you. [ Unusually coloured one??? That sounds exciting. ] Spare the small talk and let me know which colour it is.

[ A+ parenting, clearly. ]

But isn't that kind of like small talk in itself?

[Clearly...]

It's orange, though.

Tch, it ain't the same thing!!!

[ You horrible son, you. ]

okay, orange isn't my colour.. but i can live.

I'm glad to hear it. I'll be waiting!

How long can you wait? [ Lucky for you son, she's right at the front door. ]

[Best mom.]

I'm a patient person.

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